As life disabuses you of your illusion of control, you can come to feel free in a certain way that almost reminds me of childhood.
I’d say that the upside of losing so much that mattered to me is that I have considerably less fear now. I’m not trying to hold it all together, everything has already been blown apart. In addition to all the agony that brought, it also gave me a certain feeling of freedom.
I wanted what we all want: everything. We want a mate who feels like family and a lover who is exotic, surprising. We want to be youthful adventurers and middle-aged mothers. We want intimacy and autonomy, safety and stimulation, reassurance and novelty, coziness and thrills. But we can’t have it all. – The rules do not apply, Ariel Levy
De vreugde het niet te hoeven schrijven. Het is er al.